After my disappointing one-time foray on Craigslist, I began to examine if my idealism about friendship with a straight man my age was too far-fetched to have a basis in reality. Was I fishing in the wrong hole (no double entendre intended) with the wrong bait? From the responses I got from my horny married men I sensed that, besides from being sexless, they desperately craved warmth, affection, and a connection unavailable in their present circumstances. And of course, they wanted lots of hot sex. Though clueless as to how their secret quest for sexual satiation was probably unconsciously alienating them from the very tenderness (and copious sex) they sought, I was struck that we did have a common goal: wanting a strong connection with another being who values our presence in their life and shows it.
I am a fruit fly and have no qualms about it. I love my gay men friends.This probably confounds most straight men, but any woman who has a gay man in her life can heartily attest to why gay men make such great friends. First of all, I want to dispel the notion that women like gay men because they are just like their girlfriends. FYI: my girlfriends do not reek of testosterone and have penises. Secondly, the gay men I know tend to treat their women friends respectfully, enjoy witty banter, and are willing to share their intimate emotional life (for the good and bad). Finally, when we congregate we are funny, silly, jocular companions who have an ability to connect. And no, I don't have sex with my gay men friends.
At work, I have a gay coworker who literally has a gaggle of women following him wherever he goes. I have never seen anything quite like this. Women of all ages and types flock to him. Of course, it doesn't hurt that his handsome Latin looks and phermonal cologne add to his seductiveness. But what makes him truly attractive is how he interacts with women. For example, whenever he sees me he hugs me tenderly and sings silly romantic songs to me about being the love of his life. This in the middle of a busy Public Health hallway with a woman 15 yrs his senior. His unabashed willingness to act like a romantic fool with a straight women is beyond belief, but it works. He exudes a magnetism because of his passion for life and genuine happiness to interact with you as if you were the only woman on earth. Last week I told him I wanted to bottle him so we could make millions on his effervescent fervor. Joy always attracts. If he were a straight man, I would not hesitate to do him on his office desk. Awakening this kind of passion in a celibate spinster is a testament to the captivating power of enticement. Bill Clinton move over, you've just been usurped by charmer of unparalleled proportions.
So, what can a straight man learn from a gay man about women? Plenty. Learn the lost art of how to woo a woman sans the gonad-centric approach. For those not in agreement, there's always a myriad of online sites to help you get laid.
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